This post is a tad different from my usual ones. I have had a great time being Maliya's mom but recently I have realized that having become a mom is a huge challenge for someone who is a total control freak. I also feel guilty when things don't go as planned or feel like I am not doing enough and that I should be doing more as it relates to raising Maliya. This has been a challenge because anyone who knows me quickly gets the fact that I am a complete perfectionist and I don't think things are worth doing if they are not perfect. Because of that, I think I put a lot of pressure on myself to make sure Maliya looks perfect, eats perfect, behaves well, is getting stimulated enough, etc. All of these "I shoulds" have finally caught up with me and I think I need to take a bit of time to figure out who I am again- I have devoted every waking second to this little girl over the past 14 months and I think some time for myself is good. Also, when we have a second child- I am not sure this drive for perfection will due anybody good. Yikes- time out for mom!
MD
